Hey, Everyone!

This Sunday, Andy taught about how the past shapes us and how Jesus can change how our past impacts us (sermon link). We want to share two exercises below adapted from the Emotionally Healthy Church workbook to help you identify the "commandments" your family of origin lived by and discover the new way of life Jesus offers us in the gospel. We're praying that God would use this to help us live out the freedom we have as members of His family!

Exercise 1: "Ten Commandments" of Our Family of Origin
Growing up, each one of our families operated under a set of "commandments." Some of them were spoken and spelled out; others were unspoken and "understood." Take some time to jot down any rules, attitudes, and underlying assumptions your family had in the areas listed below - spoken or unspoken. Share one with a friend or spouse, and tell how it continues to influence you today.

Examples:

Money: "It's okay to spend it on others, but not on yourself."
Success: "It's getting into the best schools."
Expressing Anger: "When you are angry, it is a sin."
Loss and Grief: "You are not allowed to be sad or depressed."

Ten Commandments of My Family of Origin

Money:___________________________________________________
Success: _________________________________________________
God: ____________________________________________________
Gender Roles: ____________________________________________
Marriage: ________________________________________________
Complementing/Praising: __________________________________
Sex: ____________________________________________________
Play and Recreation: _______________________________________
Expressing Anger: _________________________________________
Loss and Grief: ____________________________________________

Exercise 2: The New Commands of our New Family
Our family of origin is the single most powerful and formative influence that has shaped the person we are today. Therefore it makes sense that Christian discipleship is ultimately about transplanting someone from their family of origin and rooting them into the new family of Christ. Just as there are established ways of handling anger, money, conflict, sex, feelings, and the like, in our family of origin, so there are new ways of thinking and acting about these things in the family of God. Discipleship is a process of unlearning and relearning, because through Christ, we've been birthed into a new family tree.

Take a few minutes to write out the gospel version of your family's commandments. In other words, if the gospel is true, how does it free you to live out your new identity as a member of God's family in these areas?

Example:

Money: "My security is found in God's love and care for me, so I don't have to live for money. Instead, I can enjoy it and use it to bless others."

Gospel Version of my Family's "Ten Commandments"

Money:___________________________________________________
Success: _________________________________________________
God: ____________________________________________________
Gender Roles: _____________________________________________
Marriage: _________________________________________________
Complementing/Praising: __________________________________
Sex: _____________________________________________________
Play and Recreation: _______________________________________
Expressing Anger: _________________________________________
Loss and Grief: ____________________________________________

We hope you enjoy the Thanksgiving holiday and we'll see you this Sunday as Andy explores what it looks like to understand your limits in order to love well.

In His grace,

The Restored Uptown Staff & Elders